~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
I recently met one of my favorite bloggers, Tess Marshall of the Bold Life. Our family was on a trip to Sedona, Arizona. Tess lives just a few hours away from Sedona in the Phoenix area. She drove up to Sedona to meet. We drank coffee together and went on a great hike at Red Rocks Crossing where we viewed beautiful red rocks, admired amazing rock cairns and put our feet into Oak Creek. We talked a lot about blogging, life and her favorite subject… being bold and letting go of fear.
We had a great conversation about how fear can hold you hostage from doing the things that you want to in life. Fears like financial issues, safety fears and fear of change. Fear for me is usually kid related. But I also have felt fearful over public speaking, (I’d like to do more) but my fear holds me back. I’m very fearful of confrontations. I just hate confrontations but sometimes they are necessary to move forward.
With my kids, I often get worried about things that haven’t happened yet. Or lately, I sometimes find myself worried when I know a little of what’s going on but don’t have enough information. For instance, I heard that my middle son who is working on the narrow gauge railroad in Durango, Colorado, had a crash with the small cars that follow the train. It was several hours before I heard the actual story and that everyone was ok. It was more of a fender bender than a crash. It’s hard not to worry though!
Usually fears turn out to be nothing. But when is it real and when do you let go? Tess’s whole life is dedicated to people becoming fear-less. I asked Tess to tell me her thoughts about fear.
She explained that sometimes fear is good. “The activities that you fear the most are stepping stones that will lead you in the direction of your biggest dream. They will cause you to stretch, grow and become a new person. They’ll rock your comfort zone!”
I had to agree that the bad things that happen are often what makes us stronger and brings us to the next level. If we can just remember that when we’re going through it!!
Tess told me that taking action is key: “When you do the things you fear doing, you send a message to the world that says, “I’m ready.”
When you take action, you put things in motion. And magic happens. You attract the right people, the best experiences and limitless opportunities. The sun shines. Doors open. The impossible becomes possible.
She mentioned “Game Changers”. I asked what those are. She replied, “Everyone’s game changers are different. Game changers are anything that you did in order to change your life in a significant way: a new career, a marriage, a divorce, a trip around the world, growing your own food, getting out of debt.
The game changers of my life include: I began running, became a wife and mother, started a business and obtained a master’s degree.”
I know I’ve had a quite a few game changers in my life, although I didn’t always realize it at the time.
I asked her what her biggest game changer was. She told me, “One of the biggest turning points in my life was when I decided to begin counseling. I was 27 years old. I was unhappy, out of control and just plain miserable. I was failing as a wife and mother. I was sick and tired of being sick and tired! I knew there had to be a better way. That one life changing decision, helped save my marriage led me to a master’s degree in counseling psychology and a private practice. Fifteen years later, I moved across the country, started blogging and began coaching and creating.
Don’t allow fear to hold you back from the life that you deserve. Don’t allow fear to rob you of your happiness, passion and purpose.
You become fearless by facing and embracing fear. Look fear in the eye and tell it to back off. Say it with power and conviction. Don’t fall for its false messages.Build your courage muscles with persistent and consistent action steps. Never back down. Never quit. If you mess up, you can try again.”
Tess’s last piece of advice for me was this and I think it’s fitting for everyone.
“Keep moving in the direction of your best life. Go after it with all the gusto you can muster. Believe you can do anything and watch what happens. I’ll be cheering for you!”
Tess recently sent me this quote that kind of sums everything up we talked about:
“We are not on this earth to accumulate victories, things, and experiences, but to be whittled and sandpapered until what’s left is who we truly are. This is the only journey that can get us to fearlessness.”
~ Arianna Huffington
By the way, Tess teaches an e-class which is starting July 1st. Just a few more days to register for the 30 Days of Bold ecourse before June 24, 2013 to enjoy the pre-registration discounted price of $99. From June 24, the course will revert to its regular price of $149. It is a great investment in yourself. You’ll receive my book Zen Tips and lots of other goodies, too. Click here to visit 30 Days to Bold. (This is an affiliate course because I believe in it!!)
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