When You Thought I Wasn't Looking
“When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw you hang up my first painting on the refrigerator,
and I wanted to paint another one.
When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw you feed a stray cat,
and I thought it was good to be kind to animals.
When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw you make my favorite cake for me,
and I knew that little things are special things.
When you thought I wasn't looking, I felt you kiss me goodnight,
and I felt loved.
When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw that you cared,
and I wanted to be everything that I could be.
When you thought I wasn't looking, I LOOKED....
and wanted to say thanks for all the things I saw when you thought I wasn't looking.”
That’s me and my youngest son. He’s such a happy boy with a great sense of humor. He loves sports and his friends. But he’s also a great companion to my husband and me. Yet, we feel him moving into those teenage years now that he’s 13. It’s time for us to let go a little. Has he been looking? Has he learned enough?
Each stage with our children is about letting go. We don’t have to worry (but we will anyway!) because hopefully if we were doing our job of setting a good example, they were watching. Children are always looking!
My sister told me a Tae Kwan Do story today. She just started doing Tae Kwon Do to begin getting her mind and body in shape. It’s already making a big difference in her life. Her 17 year old son has been leading a sedentary life. She’s been trying to get him to lose weight and exercise but he doesn’t listen too much. Yet, after watching her take control of her life, he’s now decided to join her in Tae Kwon Do. He was watching and took note.
Last weekend, my oldest son, age 19, surprised us and decided to stay in college hometown of Durango this summer. He had read Walden Pond. He has decided to live part of the time in the woods like Henry David Thoreau and contemplate life. He got a great job at a French restaurant and is being very responsible about living his life 6 hours aways from us. At first (and still now) we were a little saddened not to have him at home. But we realized that he’s been looking! He’s been looking at two very independent parents who love to read, work, travel and experience life. And now he’s doing the same thing!
Mothers, as we know, are very influential in their child’s life. I don’t think we even know how much we influence them. We mainly influence them by example. We act, they look. So enjoy your Mother’s Day and know that our children are watching and will reflect what we’ve shown them in life.
It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see.
~ Henry David Thoreau
